Small, seemingly insignificant choices we make in our 20s can shape our daily lives well into old age, just like infinitesimal changes in a rocket’s flight path can make the difference between landing on Mars or Saturn. In my book, The Rocket Years: How Your Twenties Launch The Rest of Your Life, I delve into the social science about how the decisions of young adults play out in the decades that follow. I have spent a lot of time thinking about domino effects like these. Now, singles are beginning to worry that it may have a domino effect on their lives, derailing their plans to marry and start a family. They all described how the pace of dating has slowed down, making it harder and more time consuming to start romantic relationships. As I reported this story, I spoke with single people in their 20s and 30s from a range of socioeconomic backgrounds and sexual orientations, along with researchers studying how the crisis is changing the dating landscape. Millennials and Gen Z also have less sex than previous generations for many reasons - including that they’re less likely to be in a couple.Ĭovid-19 is amplifying all of these issues, and Glaser and Bui are not alone in their frustrations. But although dating apps increase your pool of potential partners, many people say they can make dating feel impersonal, while also increasing the risk of being lied to or sexually harassed.Ĭouple this with the fact that millennials are delaying marriage or not marrying at all, which means they’re spending more of their life dating than previous generations. This coincides with the rise in dating apps, which are increasingly becoming the main way to find love: 39 percent of heterosexual couples and about 65 percent of gay couples met online in 2017, according to a 2019 Stanford University study. Nearly half of Americans say dating is harder now than it was a decade ago. In some ways, the pandemic has only exacerbated problems with dating that had been bubbling up in recent years. (This is partly why marriage rates plummeted during both the Great Depression and World War II.) Even then, promising relationships sometimes fail to go anywhere because people aren’t at their best right now: Being surrounded by disease, death, and financial instability takes an emotional toll. Apps are now one of the only ways to meet people, but it can take weeks or months to take a budding romance offline. “Friends of mine who have already graduated are now working from home, and they’re meeting even fewer people.”Ĭovid-19 has made dating harder and more laborious than it was before, singles told me in more than a dozen interviews. “My generation just isn’t getting the same opportunities to socialize as previous ones,” he says. But socializing is now considered a health risk, and Bui largely has been confined to his dorm room. He was looking forward to meeting people on campus this year, knowing college offers more opportunities to find a romantic partner than he’s likely to ever have again. Take Johnny Bui, a 22-year-old senior at Babson College in Wellesley, Massachusetts. “Time is ticking on.”Įven those who aren’t planning on marrying anytime soon are worried about whether the pandemic may shrink the pool of people they will know in their lifetime, making it harder to find a spouse. “The pandemic is delaying a relationship I hoped would happen,” Glaser says. But when Covid-19 struck, her plans, like those of many others, began to crumble. She squeezed in dates between work events and dinners with friends, expecting to settle down with a long-term partner and perhaps even start a family in the next few years. For the 33-year-old product manager at New York’s Museum of Modern Art, it was a strange feeling: Much like the swift clip of her daily runs through the city, she was used to her life moving forward. In March, Alexandra Glaser’s love life ground to a halt - and she wasn’t alone.
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